app for [ profile] capeandcowl... again!

Jun. 10th, 2011 03:31 pm
bitchinbeanie: (off with her motherfuckin heeaadd)
[personal profile] bitchinbeanie
AGE: 22
JOURNAL: rizumcbutt
IM: the p0rn nun
RETURNING: Carrie/girlyboywonder and Khisanth/fantasycliche!

FANDOM: Hellsing
CHRONOLOGY: Just after burning to a crisp!
CLASS: MASS-MURDERING PSYCHOPATH you can never have enough of those, right?
ALTER EGO: Jan Valentine, uh... Dealer in Shady Things.

In the world of Hellsing, there are vampires and there is Alucard, with a clear divide between the two. Vampires: creatures of the night, violent, mostly single-minded, and without forethought or planning, living just to enjoy the moment. They're a step above humans in strength and agility, and they typically take this as evidence of godhood, as license to rip and tear their way through whatever humans they might encounter. And then there's Alucard, the vampire that takes care of trivial matters like these, and he does it with a shadowy grin and minimal effort.

But eventually there began to come a new breed of vampire, one created to give this vampiric vampire killer, Alucard, a run for his money. Stronger, faster, able to regenerate, unfeeling of pain. Brothers Luke and Jan Valentine were the first two of these introduced in Hellsing. These two, polar opposites to each other despite their relation, were sent to the Hellsing manor with the orders to kill everyone inside, paying special attention to Integra Hellsing herself and her pet Alucard.

Cool-headed and self-possessed Luke descended to the basement to do battle with Alucard, confident that he would be the man's defeat, while hot-headed and excitable Jan (and his moaning, hungry army) took on the Hellsing soldiers to work their way toward Integra. Jan took care of the soldiers that opposed him, gleefully killing them all and turning them into ghouls to be part of his invading army. He took his time actually finding Integra though, preferring to stop along the way to enjoy bits of her wealth. He complained of the class segregation in England as he enjoyed one of her fine cigars, hinting that he was on the less fortunate side of the divide. But discovery of Integra's showy display of wealth seemed to give him renewed vigor, and he marched towards her location deciding, very loudly, to fuck her, shoot her in the head, and fuck her there too.

Walter and Seras were his first real obstacle, and he took to the challenge presented by them with nothing short of utter delight. He watched with alternating amazement and maniac joy as Walter made short work of his ghouls, and the proceeded to start on Jan himself. Jan managed to make it to the end of the hallway and fling open the door to the room in which Integra had been holding her meeting (at the expensive of one of his arms, lost to Walter's wires), only to find thirteen pistols leveled at him.

But even that wasn't too much a damper on his general delight, and as he slumped against the far wall, full of holes and leaking blood from everywhere, his laughter and vulgarity carried through to the end. He knew perfectly well that he'd failed the mission he'd been given, and that he was certainly going to die (by Walter's capable hands after a few rounds of torture, if not more quickly and immediately by his superiors themselves), and didn't seem particularly bothered by it. He had, after all, had one hell of a good time wrecking up the place. He gave Integra the clue Millennium as his superiors activated the self-destruct of the chip responsible for his vampiric nature and burned him to death.

Jan Valentine is vulgar. If he hasn't described something using the word 'fucking' in at least the last ten seconds, then he's not doing it right. He's loud, he says exactly what he thinks, and the devil may care if he's going to offend someone with it. In fact, it's probably going to be more amusing if someone is offended, so why not aim for the top? Insults are flung as casually as greetings. Murder, cannibalism, skull fucking -- none of these are topics that he spares, all get their time in the limelight.

He's also nearly the exact opposite of his brother, Luke Valentine. Luke is a carefully maintained dandy, controlled and calm and well-mannered, dressed perfectly and with his long, blond hair tied neatly back. Meanwhile Jan is a carefully maintained asshole, face full of piercings and manners loud and crass. He's talkative to the point that he needs only his own vocal chords to keep amused, rude enough to drive away a saint, blunt enough to make a sailor blush, and not to mention almost completely self-serving.

Aside from to his brother, Jan knows no real loyalty, and his main drive is generally only to create mayhem and provide himself some with some amusement. It's fine by him if he cheats a bit, bends the rules a little, it's all for the sake of the game. And the only real winner will be, of course, himself -- and whoever took it upon themselves to aim his destructiveness in a desired direction. But while he loves mowing down innocents, if he finds an actual challenge he doesn't get angry, he isn't afraid, and he's certainly not resentful to find himself being potentially torn to pieces; instead he absolutely loves the idea of a real fight, and will laugh himself hoarse even as he's losing limbs and finding holes shot through his body.

But despite his lust for chaos and generally destructive fun, Jan does knows how to keep an operation under control. He can follow orders and he won't lose his head and forget himself in the heat of battle, be it the high of victory or the gut-twisting knowledge of looming defeat. Jan Valentine is, in short, a good soldier, provided he was given enough incentive to pick a side and stay on it.

The chip that makes Jan a vampire increases his speed, stamina and agility — but not nearly to the level that the other vampires of Hellsing have. He also can make ghouls (hungry, mindless bodies with slightly increased speed and strength, but not very durable) of the corpses of people that he kills, which are under his command.

As far as non-canon abilities go, if it's possible, I'd like Jan to have a vampiric boost, since his own powers aren't all that impressive as they are. He'd be able to heal his body with the help of the shadows that Seras and Alucard use in canon, and once he got the hang of it, willingly dissolve himself into those same shadows. His strength and speed would be a little higher than what they are in canon as well.

Also: the amazing ability to navigate his way to the kinkiest pornography to be had. Kind of the Vic Sage of porn, if you will.


He's still not sure what kind of fairy fucking godmother granted him this wish, but there's no way Jan's turning it down. No sir, no gift horses are being looked in the mouth around here. Those angry little Greeks can pour out all over this set up, and Jan won't mind one bit. Because Jan's alive.

Okay, he's not really alive. That chip in him keeps him pretty convincingly dead. But he's alive enough to resume all his favorite inappropriate behaviors, and isn't that what really counts?

For some reason, the woman he's talking to doesn't seem to think so. He keeps laughing, explaining how he was totally fucked, all burned to a crisp and shit, and now he's here again! In goddamn New York City, to boot! Isn't it great?! But the bitch just keeps sobbing and shaking her head, asking him why he's doing this. It probably has something to do with the huge fucking chunk he took out of her neck earlier, and the way her hands are tied behind her back. Whiny bitch.

Whatever, Jan can find a better audience. In fact, the fairy fucking godmother gave him a pretty damn good way to get his better audience's attention. Add this weird little cell phone thing to the list of shit not to question. He's already planning an introduction that'll really make him laugh as he digs into dinner, and after a while dinner even stops whining about it.

FINAL NOTES ABOUT YOUR CHARACTER: I'm going to bring him in without memory of his time here before, if it matters!


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Jan Valentine

January 2013

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